Writing is...

Today's the beginning of a new journey for me. I'm starting a new blog--ALL ABOUT WRITING with a few other aspiring authors. It's called Tangled Up In Words and I am completely in love with everything about it.  (And I'm sure you'll be hearing more about it next week!)

I love that five people who share dreams, frustrations, hopes and a passion for writing found each other. This blog is a huge piece of our hearts, and I am so excited that we finally get to share it with the world. If you write at all, you should go check it out. We're only just starting. The next two weeks are going to be full of interviews--with each other and with authors--but then, we're jumping in to the nitty gritty stuff. We're going to talk about things we're learning, things we're seeing and wondering--and we really hope that other people jump in to the community.

Amidst all the planning for Tangled, I've been thinking a lot about what writing is and what writing isn't. Maybe I'm wrong on some of these, but they some things I've been learning.

Writing isn't....

a thing you do just because there's nothing else to do.  
Okay, so maybe for some people it is that, but I don't think that's what writing is supposed to be. It's a fluid movement, a journey, a never-ending process that's sometimes wraught with frustration, sometimes with joy, sometimes with awe, sometimes with sadness. It's part of you. It's something you must do because there's nothing else that can make you feel all those things at once.

easy.
Writing. Is. Not. Easy. I don't care if your uncle Bubba's second cousin's friend's sister's ex-boyfriend wrote a book in four hours and it was the best thing you ever read---Writing is not easy. It's hard. It's long. It's questions and answers. It's answers to the wrong questions. It's characters, plots, motivations, revisions, edits, long conversations with yourself, long conversations with others, plot holes, twists, tension, critiques, pacing, world-building, shiny-new ideas all the time that distract you, original ideas, unpredictability, revisions again, long hours of sleepless nights, early mornings, rewrites...

Get it? If you're tired then you get it. If not then read that again, because it's the same thing over and over and over. Writing is not easy. But if you love it, if you completely and absolutely can't survive without it--then you don't even care.  That's what writing is.

Writing is...


life.    love.    frustration.      revision.    ideas that expand and grow.    need.     characters that have stories to tell.    hope.    sadness.      every single emotion you can think of captured in a flickering moment.      a dance.      a song.      an adventure.    a sparkle of sunlight on a cloudy day.   rest.   constant.    inconsistent.       joy.        believing in impossible things.      friendship.    learning so many things you never knew you needed.    a journey.    escape.     breath.    happiness.    capturing.    inexpressible.    survival.     community. 

I don't know about you, but sometimes putting words on a page is the hardest thing I will ever, ever, ever do in a day. Other days it's the easiest. I think that's the beauty of all the things that writing is. Whatever those things are, they're always filled with new surprises.
And there are days--many many days--when I question what I'm doing and if it will ever, ever matter. But I know it does matter. It's part of me. It's given me the life I have right now and the amazing people who fill it up. Community is so important to a writer because on those dark days, it's what will get you through.


If you need community, if you want encouragement and challenges, then check us out on Tangled. We're right there with you. We need the same things. We need a place to share the things we're learning, to get encouragement, to build community. Take a few minutes this week to come by and leave us a comment all about you.

Build community because it's such a huge part of what writing is.

High School Library NEEDS BOOKS. How You Can Help.

***NOTE**** New address to ship books. Below.

While I was in classes a few weeks ago, I had this huge (kinda funny to me) realization. All week everyone kept talking about community. Saying "this is the place you'll build a lifeline." All week I was that smug girl who's said to myself: I have that. Because I do have that. I have it in bloggers, in readers, in writers, in authors, in twitter. I know I have people.

I know I'm part of a community that bans together to stand up for literary injustice, backlash, plagarism and everything in between. We build hashtags on twitter and give small ideas a way to be big. We're awesome.

That's why when the director of my MFA program sent us an email about a book drive, I knew I had to bring the need to my community. This community. Why? Well...

"The literature section of Ballou Senior High School's library in Washington, DC has 63 books, not enough to fill five small shelves. In the area marked "Pure Science," there are 77 volumes. The generally accepted standard for school libraries is 11 books for each of Ballou's 1,104 students."

THAT'S WHY.

It's completely unacceptable that a high school is lacking a basic need of life, a need that opens the doors to education, creativity and imagination---books. And this is the time for all of us to step up, to ban together, to help out. No matter what genre you read, because they need everything.

This selection I take out of the email from my program director because he says it better than I ever could.

"It's a challenge for kids to take their literacy seriously when they don't even have books to read. Ballou is located in the most dangerous ward in our nation's capitol. Right now, the library serves as a physical safe space and a refuge for students in off school hours, but wouldn't it be great if they had something to read while they were there--even choices across genre?....This is not the only school in the country with needs, but when the flare went up we saw it and chose to respond."

What they need:

Everything.  From Shakespeare to Octavia Butler to Richard Wright. Fantasy, sci-fi, YA, adult fiction, history books, poetry, classic literature, science. Basically anything and everything that's suitable for high school. They will take anything as long as it is in GOOD condition and has no writing in it. 

I've asked if they would accept ARCs (new and old), and the director of the book drive, Lisa, said YES. Please note however, that this they really need finished copies. ARCs are fantastic, but the lasting value isn't always standing.

How to donate:

If you have books you want to give, please mail them directly to:

The Art of Living Center
International Association for Human Values
c/o Filiz Odabas-Geldiay
2401 15th St. NW
Washington, DC 20009

There should be a note inside donation boxes that says:
Green Line Initiative Book Drive 
attn: Lisa Pegram
They will be accepting books until August 22!! 

Also, if you'd like to include some kind of quick note for the kids, words of encouragement, that would be awesome!! But it's not mandatory.

Spread the word!

Reblog this post on your blog. Tweet this post. (we're on twitter at #HSBookDrive) Tell everyone. Send books.

This is a chance for our community to step up, to reach out and to provide teens with books. This is why we are here so I challenge you to be part of this. If you can, if you have even one book or a stack of books from that project you finished a year ago, give them. Donating books is not really about the book, but about what happens when someone reads a book. And not even having a chance to read a book is completely devastating to me. I can't even imagine my life without books.

I hope you will help!! Even if you can't send a book--tweet, tell others, and take action.

Life Lessons from Geometry and Cookies (or Square Peg Syndrome)

I'm sitting here failing to write a book review. I have many I need to write, but the words just keep failing me. My brain is trapped in one mode: shapes.

Things are "simple" with shapes. Square. Triangle. Circle. Rectangle. Pentagon....What you see is what you get. Count the sides and there's no room for question. A square is a square is a square is a square...no matter the size or color or location.

But when you think about it--really think about it--it does matter. 

If you flip a rectangle over a few degrees, you get a diamond. If you make that loop in the circle a little too long, you get an oval. There are other types of triangles: obtuse, acute, right. I think math-people would say all those are very different things, even if they are essentially the same.

That's the whole point of this post: everyone is different. Every blog, every book, every writer is different. Even if they are essentially the same.

Why am I talking about this? A few reasons. (stick with me)

1) A friend and I were talking about contemporary books all having a similar rhythm and way with words. She said it was a formula that even paranormal books have. I keep trying to agree with that, and can't. Because the words and rhythm of Author A should be different than Author B, even if the stories are similar. Because they are different.

2) I stumbled in a conversation that someone only needed to read one blog--because they were all the same anyway. This, of course, is complete crap. (Sorry, person.) But every blog is different. Sure, they may share meme's and review the same books, but the opinions, ideas and voices of each person are so incredibly different.

3) My real-life community is in a transition (my whole life is it seems); we're going from a dream, a hope, a plan to a reality. And with that there are things that need to happen, roles that need to be filled, a place where everyone needs to fit. It's exciting! I love that it's all happening and I want to dive in and help. But the things they need help aren't things that I enjoy doing or really even want to do whole-heartedly. So, that makes me feel displaced, like a square peg that's trying to fit in a round hole.


I was thinking about ALL that. About how we put ourselves in these boxes. About how we make life this checklist and force all the things around us to fit into it. And it doesn't fit. But we shove anyway. We twist. We pull. We push. We trim. We shape. We want it to fit. And then we wonder why, in the end, we're tired and broken.

Here's why:  a square cannot be a circle.

Well, &%^#! What now? What do we do when we can't be the fill the kind of need that exists? When we can't be the type of blogger who brings in 15 bazillion unique visits in a day? When we aren't the kind of writer that makes words flow and dance and hearts stop beating and tears fall because the lines are so good?

You're right. We quit. We don't try to find a place to fit. We don't create something new. We stop existing and disappear.

I bet that's what Augustine Rodin did he got the idea for The Thinker...laughed and threw away the design because it was too different.

I bet that's what Oatmeal Raisin cookies did when they couldn't be Chocolate Chip--just stopped existing because they weren't good enough.


And when JK Rowling had an idea about a little magical boy named Harry with black hair, a scar and glasses, she completely scrapped that idea because it was too hard and too scary.

Oh wait...they didn't? You mean, The Thinker is one of the most famous sculptures of all time? And people actually eat Oatmeal Raisin cookies? And--what??--JK Rowling is like the twelfth richest woman and one of the most influential women in Britain?

Fine. But what does all this have to do with shapes and blogging and writing--I'm so confused?!

It has to do with this: BE YOURSELF.

We're taught that in elementary school, but somewhere along the way we forget. We become so obsessed with fitting into the mold, we forget that we are supposed to be different! We are different. Every person has something about them that's unlike anyone else, even if sometimes it seems essentially the same. No two people are alike. And you know that saying, "Opinions are like noses. Everyone has one." And they are all uniquely different.

So what if I can't find a place to serve and help that's exactly what I want to do. I can find something else! I can say hello to people and celebrate that a dream is becoming a reality. I can watch and wait and find a way to serve that fits me when it comes up. Me. A job no one else may see as a need until later. I matter there. 

So what if your blog only has 200 followers--that's awesome! Remember when it was you and your best friend and some random kid who entered a contest? You've come far! And no one comments on your reviews? Oh well. The four people that are reading them are listening to you. And that post you wrote last week, yea...that really affected someone. Remember that email? Don't doubt your blog because it's your voice. Yours.

SO WHAT if the words in your novel don't make you want to cry at every line. Who wants to cry at every line? Just write the book! Just tell the story. Let it suck...and then fix it. And take criticism. And then fix it. And fix it some more. And make the words flow. EVEN IF it doesn't sound like author A & B. I'd say that's good! I don't want all my books to sound the same. I don't all my characters to have a dead mother or a dead sister or a crazy boyfriend. I want different. That crazy aunt who talks to the flowers in her closet--I'd read that. Write it. Find your voice---YOURS. Not JK Rowling's. Not Cassie Clare's. Not Rachel Hawkins' or James Patterson's or your crit partner's. YOURS.

No one else can tell your story or fill your role. Only you. And if you don't do it--if you don't step up and be yourself and take a chance--then no one else will do it for you.

Not me because I can barely do it for myself.

Not that girl who doesn't know there's an entire world of blogs out there and she's missing out.

Not that agent who's waiting for a story just like yours.

Only you.

Everything has a place it belongs. And eventually, even the square finds a place to fit.

The first time is memorable

Firsts are important. First car. First kiss. First line.

In the fun book-ish world, you can add some other types of firsts...and these are momentous in the life a writer--or blogger.

First ARC you get in the mail. First blog post. First comment on said blog post. First book signing. First launch party.  First dinner with an author. First time my blog gets me a quote in an article. First post in which you go link crazy. First contest. First book expo event.

In the last few months, I've been watching as all these awesome things keep happening. It blows me away. And today--I did the last one on my list. I had my first book expo event. And it was glorious!

It was called NEIBA, which I was able to go to because of my job as a independent bookseller. I didn't really know what to expect (aside from the books.) Luckily, I had Irish there to guide and direct me some. What did I discover? Only the most excellent time ever. I met great publishing reps for our store and had some wonderful conversations about YA and the blogging and book selling world. It's amazing how connected they are--and how full of incredible people. The community here amazes me more and more each day.

Anyway...as I'm sure you are wondering...here's the fun stuff I got today!!

Some it is going toward the YA Spooktacular Event...so you'll have to make sure you check that out for some fun stuff! (Another first! I've never hosted a blogging event before.)

The exciting thing is that there are so many more firsts to look forward to!

The first BEA. The first author guest post. The first book tour stop I go to. The first time I break 100 followers.

The first time I send out a query. The first time I sent out partials. The first time I get an agent (and hopefully the only time). The first time I get a book deal (and hopefully not the last). And then the first a cover and first ARC.

Sure. I know that those could be a loooooong time from now, but they are still hopes I cling to and work toward. After all, what is life if not hope?

SPEAK. You have a voice

Words are very powerful and this is the one time of year that people realize that, and fear it.

Wesley Scroggins, an associate professor of management at Missouri State University, finds the book SPEAK by Laurie Halse Anderson "filthy and immoral." He calls is "soft pornography." You can read his article here.  The fact that Mr. Scroggins can see this as porn makes my stomach turn. These are his words: 

In high school English classes, children are required to read and view material that should be classified as soft pornography.

I daresay that teenagers get these things from 9 out of 10 movies and television shows on the air right now. But I digress, as that is a point for another day. He says this of the book:

This is a book about a very dysfunctional family. Schoolteachers are losers, adults are losers and the cheerleading squad scores more than the football team. They have sex on Saturday night and then are goddesses at church on Sunday morning. The cheer squad also gets their group-rate abortions at prom time. As the main character in the book is alone with a boy who is touching her female parts, she makes the statement that this is what high school is supposed to feel like. The boy then rapes her on the next page. Actually, the book and movie both contain two rape scenes.

I'm sorry but sometimes, this is the opinion of teenagers. Some families are dysfunctional. Some teachers are viewed as losers (I had some) and yes, girls do have sex--and guys--and they go to church on Sunday like everyone else. There are stigmas on high school and sex and what is "normal." There always has been. (I mean, go watch Grease.) These things DO happen in real life and I daresay that's why Scroggins doesn't like it. But, that's not the point of me writing this post.

I read SPEAK in high school, when my drama teacher told all of us that we should read it. She even bought copies that we could read and kept them in her classroom. (She was a Christian as well, which Scroggins talks about in his article.) SPEAK is a book about a girl who is raped, and her struggles to move on. Her journey to find just how important her voice is.

We ALL have this struggle.

Sure, it's not always with rape, but there is something that we have that we can't always find the words to say. Maybe it is rape, or sex or drugs or goodness, even something as simple as under/over-eating or lying or jealousy. The list is numerous.

I think the point of a book like SPEAK is to give the courage to say those things. Whatever they are.

For Myra, who wrote this amazing post, it's her faith. For C.J., it's her story. These are only two examples. There are more that have opened up about this just today. In response. (And I highly doubt it was the response Scroggins expected.) There's a pretty exhaustive listing here. In addition, he's also called another YA book Twenty Boy Summer. The author of that Sarah Ockler, shares her opinion and also tells you how you can take a stand.

I'll say one of the things on my list: I was sexually abused when I was little. It's one of those taboo things that people don't talk about--and especially in my family. We don't talk about anything real. Even now. When I read SPEAK in high school, it affected me so much because I never, ever told anyone. No one. But it happened. I remember it from first to second grade and later, I as I grew up--until about fourth grade.  In corners, in nooks of the house, in the basement.  It was a long time, a big secret and a lot of pain. Now, they are vague memories but the pain and shame that accompanied them for so many years will always be fresh.

Middle school sucked for me. I was shell of a person. I tried to know something, to have something solid to hold on to, but I never really found it anywhere except books. Not friends. Certainly not family. There was nothing but me and my misery. Even when high school started and I became a Christian. I tried but there was always something missing. And I wanted it. Sometimes, I still wonder if I've found it. God is good to me and he's definitely been there--and is there--even when I'm not sure. He proves it through days like today.

Something C.J. wrote really resonates with me.

Maybe SPEAK isn't Dr. Scroggins' cup of tea. Maybe the idea of having his children read about a highly dysfunctional family is upsetting. Maybe the thought of having rape be a terrible reality in the life of the book's main character offends him. That's his right. But for every child who is blessed with a non-dysfunctional home and who hasn't been broken by something as awful as rape, there's another girl like me. A girl who can't find the words to describe how shattered she feels. Who doesn't even know if she has the right to feel shattered. Who's learned that bringing her secrets to the light results in more pain. That girl needs books like SPEAK to be on the shelves. She needs to know there are others out there like her. She needs to see someone else's path so she can have the language to start thinking about her own outcome.

This was me. The year after I read SPEAK I opened up. I definitely think it was part of the reason was because of this book. Not all of it, as my faith does play a role, but part. There is power in words.  To heal, to love, to grieve, to rejoice. There is power to spark something amazing and painful and full, which if you read either of the posts I linked you will see. The things he has said hurts my heart. Opinions are like noses I guess...but they still leave marks. I support SPEAK.  I always will.

If you've never read it,  buy a copy now. If you have, head on over to Anderson's post about this situation and show your support. If you are on twitter, tweet about it with the #SpeakLoudly hashtag. Promote this.

Words are powerful.

We can either let people like this keep them from being heard, keep us silent, or we can ban together and stand our ground. We can speak. We can shout. The more of us there are the louder will be.

Skip A Starbucks Day...Bring a girl home from China.

I heard this incredible story on Myra McEntire's blog and then again on Rachel Hawkins and I had to share it. I mean, I am PRO adoption. This story made me cry.

Check out the full story on CJ Redwine's blog. I was going to recap it but it's her story....and it's incredible.

Basically, you pay $5 (which is the cost of one grande iced vanilla latte) and you help bring a girl, named Johanna Faith, home from China to her new family. And, as if that act was enough, you can win something. Lots of things. So, it's $5, a prize and a little girl who needs her family.

Skip a Starbucks. Or a Dunkin Donuts. Or McDonalds. Skip it & change a life. Seems pretty simple for just $5.

Also, if you donate at CJ's page, leave a comment here. I'll send someone a prize too. I have some ARCs lying around...

Here's what I need: Comment with the following information:
Did you donate money? y/n
Did you tweet this cause to help? y/n (Add link) +2
Did you facebook this cause? (add link) +4

"I'm a reflection of the community."

I’m BIG on community. I love it. I love having people who know me, really know me, who like me for the crazy, lost, random, indecisive me that I am. I need encouragement, acceptance, love, freedom--and I need it from people who know me. M. Scott Peck once said, "There can be no vulnerability without risk; there can be no community without vulnerability; there can be no peace, and ultimately no life, without community." If he was right, then community, literally, is a circle. In both definition and action.

I feel as if I have always been on the search for true community, even before I knew what it was I was looking for. I needed people who were the same yet different, who were bonded with me over something. I think that all of us, every single person, longs for some form of community. We search for it in clubs and friends, in jobs, in churches, in teams, on Facebook, in chat rooms. (I can continue but I wont. You get it.) There are some who find it in these places and some who don't. There are some, and I fall into this category, who have glimmers of it--but glimmers do not a whole picture make.

Eventually, after a couple long and trying years, I got tired of searching. When I did, something fantastic happened: I met Myra McEntire. We lived in the same city at the time and she came into my Borders. Through some random things, I started talking to her. I remember that I said to her, "I'm a writer. I just started working on a YA novel...I've been looking for people to connect with." She smiled, grabbed my arm and said something that I had no idea would impact my life as it has. Her words: "Are you on Twitter? Get on Twitter." I had Twitter but I didn't know what I had until she talked to me.

Apparently, there’s a world full of young adult authors and bloggers on twitter—and they will talk to you, answer questions, encourage, connect. What is the crazy world!???!? Now, it's August, my sixth month of YA life on Twitter, and I am blown away by it. Not Twitter itself but the people. Oh my gosh the people.

I have never seen a community like this. It is the most incredible group of people, people who genuinely care about each other, who pour out their lives, hearts, time, wisdom to help others learn and grow. I’m in it. I tell my best friend that it is my social life and, in a way, it is. I have developed relationships with amazing people who have changed me with their words, their laughter, their encouragement—and I haven’t even met most of them. I'm not sure what it is exactly that makes this community so incredible. Maybe it simply that you share something you are passionate about. Passion is easy to bond over. And when that passion is writing, or reading, that bond is remarkable.

The YA community is the most amazing thing I’ve ever been part of. I know that I have an immense purpose for being part of it (stumbling into it, really!) And my biggest advice to anyone pursing anything in writing (especially in the YA world) is to get on Twitter and connect. It sounds weird--and I get that--but I also know that I've had amazing coffees, dinners, cupcakes, conversations, encouragement and all-around support with amazing people, who are the authors and bloggers and readers on Twitter.


I was trying to figure out what to call this post. Then I found the title quote by...ahem...Tupac (2pac or Tupac Shakur, if you prefer). Random but fitting. Why?

Because I AM a reflection of the community.

I would've never made it this far without every single person who has reached out to me. I hope that I reflect them well. I also hope that you feel the same. I hope that the YA community on Twitter is your social life, your family, your friends. And if so, reflect them well. If we do, the next generation of YA writers will have something to believe in and they will pass it on because community is a circle.