In Which I Make an Exciting Announcement

It's hard to believe that a mere three months ago I announced my three book deal for the Boundless Series (Follow Me Through Darkness.) It's hard to believe because I'm here - again - with ANOTHER BOOK DEAL!

I'm thrilled to announce that I have sold SALT (& it's sequel!) to Entangled Publishing! Woo! *happy dance*

Danielle Ellison's SALT, in which a powerless witch suddenly saves herself from a demon attack and must discover the key to her powers in order to prove herself worthy to fight alongside her people to protect humanity, to Liz Pelletier at Entangled, in a nice deal, in a two-book deal, for publication in August 2013 (World). 

I've been sitting on this news since Halloween - and man, it has been hard. I *love, love* SALT (you've seen it online called Hotboyalicious) and I can't wait to share this book with you. Penelope has a special place in my heart and her world is one I would never leave if I had the choice.

SALT will release in August 2013 -- which is like 7 months from now! Ahh! -- through a new imprint at EP called Entangled DigiTEEN. This imprint is one of the new ones that fall under the distribution merger with Macmillian/St Martin's Press. It's really an exciting time to be joining EP!

What's the story behind this book deal? Well, one of my betas read SALT & told me I should sub to EP. But I was totally Going To Get An Agent With This Book because I was so close last time. Then, I queried A LOT of agents & everyone loved the book, the world, the characters, the writing -- but I got a resounding plea that the market wasn't taking this kind of paranormal (witches/demons) no matter how unique it was. While waiting in the query trenches I told my beta I would sub it and I did.

Meanwhile, I'm still querying away and getting a lot of request--seriously sent 100 queries & had about 30 MSs out in a month-ish--and all of that starts dwindling down with "query me later," and "I love this but..." and "paranormal doesn't sell."

And then, the day after Halloween, I got an email from Liz saying they wanted to pub SALT. After some discussions with agents, phone calls with Liz & Guillian (editorial assistan), some rearranging with FMTD schedule and a lot of flailing, I now have a two-book deal!

I'm very pumped because SALT & FTMD couldn't be more different - and you'll get to see two sides of my writing. It also means I have A LOT of books to work on!

My new release schedule looks like this:

August 2013 - Salt (digital only)
Feb/March 2014 - Salt sequel (digital only)
October 2014 - Follow Me Through Darkness (print/digital)
April 2015 - Boundless series #2 (print/digital)
October 2015 - Boundless series #3 (print/digital)

FIVE books. It's sorta crazy & I still feel like a kid at Christmas pinching myself over & over again because this can not be real. I'm beyond blessed - and I can't wait share my stories with you!!!

*bounces* *hooks up electricity in writing cave*

Meet Carter

Over on Tangled Up in Words, we're interviewing our characters! 

If you go over now, you can meet Carter. He's my lovely boy MC from Hotboyalicious (not real title). 

It's his first interview, his first public appearance, and he was pretty excited. I think his answers are embarrassing, but that's Carter. 

I'd love if you went to meet him.

He'd love it too. 

Check it out! 

GOGOGOGOGOGO!

I'm Scared

I've been having a hell of a time figuring out what how to start FMTD2. I hate beginnings, which is a huge part of the problem, but this book is different. I see the large plot of the book very clearly (like how [___] is destroyed by [___] and how [___] happened) but the small details are not as obvious. I can't even create fake blanks for those.

After a week (or so) of trying to figure it out, I then determined that the problem with everything I was jotting down was that my MCs voice was wrong. I spent all day on Monday obsessing over how I was going to fix this, how I was going to find her again, and where the heck she went.

When I got home, my editor (who luckily or unluckily gets to double as BFF) says to me:
"The voice is fine. It's her at the end of the book, which is what you want. The problem is that you are scared that you'll mess this up and have to rewrite it eight times."

Glory, glory hallelujah. 

As you know, I wrote Follow Me Through Darkness eight times before I got it right. And while it's awesome that I kept at it, it sure did a number on me. I don't think I realized that until this week. Now, I have this crippling of fear of writing ALL my books eight times. And well, when you're working on the sequel to the book that caused all the fear, it can be pretty daunting.

No. Not daunting, terrifying. I'm terrified.

Not of the book (though there are missing pieces and I'm working with a MC who is NOT forthcoming at all) but because I don't want to fail. Guys, I don't want to re-write this book eight times. That worry is almost debilitating, and with FMTD2, it made me not know how to start and to question everything from my characters to my plot to myself.

With my last book, Hotboyalicious (not real title), I had this same fear--but it manifested in hatred. I was scared of that one because it was a different genre, character, voice, style. I guess, deep down, I was scared of writing it eight times. That was made pretty evident when I had to start over after 50k. But once I did, it was awesome. (I'll have to tell you more about this later.)

Once Patricia told me what was going on, once she pointed out the root problem was me and not my book, everything clicked. In two days (after a period of wallowing and ignoring life with tv shows and a little crying), I've written over 5k. It's small, but I'm feeling confident. I believe in my MC again, in this story, in this series, and I'm thrilled.

Does that mean I'm still not scared? No. I am. But I have a book to write--and I don't have a lot of time to do it. I wanted to tell this story, and I get to. And honestly, I'm bigger than my fears. Plus, if I want this to be a career then I have to get over myself.

Some authors rewrite, and maybe that's just the kind of author I am.  Maybe I finish this draft or make it halfway and need to start over. That would suck, a lot, but when I look at FMTD and how proud of that book I am, how hard I worked to make it fantastic, is re-writing the worst thing that can happen?

No, it's not.

I tell you all this because I am scared. I hope you don't hate my book(s). I'm scared I won't do the story justice. I'm scared everyone will hate my MC (even though she's stubborn and endearing.) I'm scared it won't strike a chord with anyone. I'm scared I won't succeed. But I am still writing.

Nothing I'm afraid of will stop me, so don't let it stop you.

The SCARY Thin Line Between Love and Hate

I am so in love with my WIP.

This is a new emotion, because for WEEKS I've only complained to my gracious and wonderful CPs how much I hate this book.

And I do hate it sometimes.

I hate it because it's different for me. I get nervous about writing a story that's this "different" and this out of my comfort zone. Can I pull it off? What does it mean for me and my future? Is this really the kind of author I want to be known as? Will Hotboyalicious (not real title) forever alter the things I can write? I don't know.

I hate it because it challenges me in ways that I never knew I struggled in as a writer. Because I can't seem to get a grasp on the story. Because it's ever growing and changing and I have no clue what's going on. The subplots are going in every direction. The voice of my MC feels off to me, and I think it's all in my head (at least that's what those CPs tell me) and I can't quite determine if the love interest comes off as insta-love. I have too many ideas and I'm already at 50k and not even halfway done with all of them. I even have an outline, that I don't know how to follow anymore but somehow keeps finding itself back in the story.

But mostly, I hate this WIP because it makes me doubt myself. Sometimes I wonder if I'm the right person to be telling this story. I've written a few books now and I've never looked at one with such uncertainty before. I get really excited about writing it, but when the time comes to sit down and do it, I get trapped inside my own head all these worries, and all the insecurity and you know what?

IT IS SCARY.

I'm not one who gets caught up a lot in writing doubt. That's not to say I think I'm the best in the world or anything---I can barely take a compliment. Ask my CPs. But it's just something I do. I put the words on the page and go. So the fact that I'm so stunted with this WIP is really, really scary. I have to constantly battle myself out of the doubt.

The thing that's striking me today, is that underneath the hate I feel toward it for these reasons, I also love it. I'm talking let's run away together and fly to the moon, love it.

These characters are my favorite out of any thing I've written. The mythos is fun. The story, while out of control, is surprising and lovely. My MC is snark and bubbles and confusion--which makes her easy for me connect to, since that's currently what I'm feeling. My love interest is awesome. He's so amazing. I think I love him more than my MC. And what's even more--this story is fun to read. 



There's a thin line between love and hate. And with this WIP, I find myself constantly teetering the line. Some words, I hate it. Other words, I love it. I have to keep telling myself that this is just a first draft! And that's hard too because I write clean first drafts. I have to let go of some control with Hotboyalicious (not real title) and let the character and the story unveil itself. Then, later, I can polish.

Today, I love my WIP. We spent hours together yesterday, talking through some of our issues, and I find myself with a renewed excitement. How long will that stay around? I don't know. But for now, I'm sure going to try and embrace it.

Does anyone else find themselves struggling with this? Someone tell me I'm not alone!!

What a Difference a Day Makes!

On Thursday, I wrote this post where I kinda complained about the in-between. Mostly, I was frustrated with this new WIP I have, HOTBOYALICIOUS (not real title.) I had two really exciting opening chapters, some characters that I was really looking forward to writing, and this amazingly-developed mythos. The only thing I didn't have? The next chapter.

And I've been stuck here since Christmas! I talked to writer friends about it. Took on a few different approaches to find out the next chapter. Took some time away. Tried to work on different project. Nothing worked. Then I figured out that I didn't really have a plot---which prompted the post on Thursday.

It's depressing when you realize you have all the elements to tell a story, except what's the most important piece. It sucks. And my best friend Patricia and I spent all of our daily hour phone call complaining about being stuck. (Because she was in the same place I was.)

What a difference a day makes!

I don't know what happened. I was sitting in my office, doing work on Friday (which is the busiest day all week!) and I had this idea. So I wrote it down. And then another, and I wrote that down. Something clicked and I had some more of this plot. Patricia and I spent two hours on the phone talking through mine--and hers, which fantastically took a positive turn while she battled a migrane Thursday night.

HOTBOYALICIOUS now has a plot.

Which is funny, because it was there all along but  I was missing that one minor piece that would thread the whole story together. It's been a very exciting weekend--full of plotting, which I have never done for a whole novel before ever until now, and writing.

This story is different for me. My last book took so much time to perfect--and I love it--but Hotboyalicious is a whole new level for me. It's so much fun. I often have to stop myself from gigglefits in between writing scenes. My CP and my friend who are both reading, love my characters, too. That's a great feeling.

What a difference a day makes.

Seriously. If you're writing and you're stuck anywhere near where I was....just give it time. I promise you'll figure it out. Sometimes the story just needs to reveal something to you that you're missing. Be patient (which is so so so so so hard.) But in the end, so worth it.

In the meantime, I have a writing retreat next weekend and I'm going to spend it writing Hotboyalicious. And hopefully, containing my giggles so other people don't stare at me.